Every married couple wants a long and happy life. However, many choose the wrong partner and eventually lead to divorce and separation. For this reason, before deciding to get married, first know the criteria in choosing the right partner. You find your life partner by visiting this dejtasmart.se
Here’s how to choose the right life partner and soulmate according to Edy Wiyono or more popularly known as Edy’s father in his book, Don’t Choose Your Partner Wrong.
1. Bebet Weight Seeds
Javanese people have a philosophy in choosing a mate based on the weight of the seed. According to parenting expert and the initiator of the Indonesia Strong From Home Movement, Ayah Edy, the concept is full of wisdom and can still be applied today.
Seeds are a way for someone to choose a partner by looking at genetic factors or heredity, not only a matter of inheritance of physical characters but also basic traits. For example, quiet, chatty, dominant or passive traits are traits inherited from previous generations.
Meanwhile, weight is a person’s inner and outer qualities such as the potential one has. According to Edy’s father, the way to assess the weight of a partner is to pay attention when he talks, whether he has a vision, purpose and life plan.
While Bebet is the origin of the family. Some say it includes the social status, dignity and wealth of the family. However, in this 238 page book, Edy’s father also adds that what is far more important than that is looking at the family background: Is your prospective family a good family and what are the parenting patterns they apply to your candidate?
If his behavior does not show seriousness, it means he is clearly not a soulmate. There’s no point in holding on. There are several things to measure the seriousness of a partner, including keeping promises, daring to meet parents, and making clear plans.
Compatibility is the key to a long and happy marriage relationship. Before you decide whether it’s suitable or not, try to check deep into your heart whether you feel suitable and accept bad habits or shortcomings and don’t expect him to change in the future.
“Don’t be in a hurry to say that you are suitable just because your face is handsome or beautiful, even though you don’t really know him. Remember, good looks and beauty will fade. What lasts is compatibility and kindness,” wrote Edy’s father in his book published in July 2017.
4. Pay attention to the codes
According to the man who is also a child education practitioner, to identify your soulmate there are signs or codes that you can ‘read’. In addition to physical signs such as having to be white or having a high nose, the code to find your soulmate can also be in the way you talk, look in your eyes, or even be cool or humorous and like to joke around.
“My wife, for example, is interested in me because she thinks I’m funny. Don’t ignore personal taste. Ask yourself, what criteria do you want from your future husband/wife?,” added Edy’s father.
5. Support Your Life Plan Your
only one soulmate and he is the one who will support your dreams. If the person who is close to you right now is against your life plan or life goals, chances are that he is not your soulmate.
“In choosing a soulmate, don’t just rely on love. Love is blind. Love will usually be present when you spend time with someone,” wrote Edy’s father.
6. Listen to your heart, not what other people say.
When you are with your soulmate, your heart will be calm. You will feel comfortable and comfortable with him. According to Edy’s father, never force yourself to marry someone just because you have to or pressure from your parents and the environment.